When I remember him kissing my shoulders it comes in flashes:
splashes in a dark pool. Hopelessly uncool,
grainy footage, like a security camera, and I
legs spread, head spinning:
“someone please tell me you want me.
Tell me you love me.”
There are three and a half billion women alive
and I could die here,
sipping a beer, curled around barstools, wondering what they all do
to live better than me. They make living look so easy.
And now it is midnight and the pool tiles reflect light like mirrors.
I am asking him favors. My voice wavers and he
is trying to pull a hand through my tangled hair
but it’s hopeless. I won’t forget this.
Mistakes I Made While Drunk
(Source: allmymetaphors, via vastandshitty)
I love you without knowing how, or when, or from where. I love you simply, without problems or pride: I love you in this way because I do not know any other way of loving but this, in which there is no I or you, so intimate that your hand upon my chest is my hand, so intimate that when I fall asleep your eyes close.
written by Pablo Neruda, 100 Love Sonnets (via observando)
I am better than I was.
I will be better than I am.
written by (140/365) by (DS)
I never wanted something safe
I wanted something of a storm
With raging feelings and hands that can’t keep off each other
I never wanted quite nights talking about our favorite movies
I wanted spontaneous visits and our bodies intertwined.
I didn’t want somber apologies
I wanted you to make sure I treated you right
I wanted you to fight for me,
I never wanted you to leave me behind
I needed something that made my insides combust with what felt like a universe exploding in me
written by I needed: Carol Shlyakhova(strong-but-breakable)
I am in love with everyone old and everyone new at the same time
I HAVE A MENTAL ILLNESS
a few actually
so take what I say lightly
don’t follow me
and coddle me when the ledge feels too close
Anonymous said: my second favorite face is the face you make when you orgasm. my first favorite face is the face you make when you've just woken up and you realize I was laying next to you.
okay, you got me.
Go all the way with it. Do not back off. For once, go all the goddamn way with what matters.
written by Ernest Hemingway (via emmalynsullivan)
(Source: maddierose, via tuff-desperado)
I have a psychiatrist appointment tomorrow afternoon to replace all of my medicine. I paid my registration fee for PM and also asked all of the questions that have been keeping me up all night. I toured a school for my sister and it really solidified me going to PM despite everyone doubting it being a good idea financially for me. Hopefully a house will put itself in front of us soon, that’s the only missing puzzle piece.
tonight made up for every night that has been shitty for the last two months in the weirdest ways
I’m always soft for you, that’s the problem. You could come knocking on my door five years from now and I would open my arms wider and say ‘come here, it’s been too long, it felt like home with you.’
written by Azra.T “My Heart is Full of Open Windows.” (via cradle-to-the-crypt)
(Source: loveless-people, via chewinghosts)
sometimes it really fucking hurts to be me and sometimes it really rules idk man my life is ruled by my personality disorder I guess but srsly sometimes I wanna lay on the floor of Kroger at 2 am and sometimes I want to fall in love again
Shout out to everyone dating their crush. You put yourself out there and look at you now. Wow. Proud of you.
I didn’t really believe in crushes until a little over a year ago, that’s when I had my first serious crush. The kind of crush that made me painfully shy and my cheeks beet red every time I was in his presence. When I visited the city he lived in, I looked for him. I would scout out the streets near his job for his scooter, I would check his social media sites at least once a week. (I would go through phases of him constantly on my mind, or completely in the back of it.) My best friend and I gushed over how handsome he was, every time we went to his shop we would ask each other if we thought he would be there. Most often, he wasn’t. I had known he was in a serious and long-term relationship for the entirety of the time I knew of him. Surprisingly, I didn’t go after him, which is completely out of character for me. I didn’t introduce myself until a year later over this site. That crush developed into one of the most beautifully terrifying and freeing love affairs I’ve ever been involved in. I miss it every day, but crushes are crushes for a reason. A crush can fucking cripple you, so sometimes it’s just much better to lust from afar.
there is nothing poetic about sitting on your grandmother’s porch at 2:30 am smoking cigarettes in the cold, it’s pathetic